Friday, April 14, 2006

honestly, its so hard to express myself now. just before the net set up i was all ready with the right string to unravel the knot of emotion-- but i've lost it.

if i dont get a scholarship, i am going to
1/ take night classes in fashion design and fashion redering
2/ belly dance with mandy and inflict permanent brain damage onto the people who didnt contribute their taxes as good citizens should have to providing us money for gainful employment [ie scholarship] we will also be taking up swedish to jar your mind so bewwareeeee the twin terrors
3/ learn to sulam-- embroider kebayas and baba shoes. and to cook. and become an honorary nonya lady. i swear, if i stay here i WILL do this, even if making belacan stinks up the whole house.

doing all this would probably eat up a lto of time i guess so i would be happily occupied enough. embroidery for one would help a lot-- doing thinsg with hands has always had a calming effect on me. which also suggests the idea of taking up pottery again, seriously and for good.

SIDETRACK: john berger mentions affandi. the sg arts scene suddenly becomes illuminated

i wonder if you remember the inching worm


mellie contemplated 12:58 AM
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