i shall not report on the morning- its a surprise for wednesday. im braching myself for the fallout hurhur. suffice to say the few of us were in hysterics at the dance studio preparing :))
ran all the way from school to buona vista to submit my documents to moe; on a whim i went for a walk around the ghim moh area [its just like me i know. im weird] which was good. i reconnoitered the area we used to walk back when we were in j one, went to see the old ts; a dead tree branch has fallen over the walkway leading from th main building to the back gate. the diseased guava trees that shed white fluff on your head are still there. the area has been given a facelift-- the rundown charm has been reduced in a way, but i guess it enver really was about setting, but rather memory. the man who busks at the underpass is still there, playing the guitar with his son. yesterday he talked to me, and i wonder that in the whole year in which i passed him i never once had the chance to do that. his son came up to me spontaneously and gave me a hug, he's a lovely child-- he asked me lots of little boy questions as his father played me a tune. we took a photo, and i gave him a hug back. but because i was late, i had to go. the man called after me to thank me. 'god bless,' he said. the little boy grinned and waved, shouting Bye! Bye! after me. it was hard to leave without choking something back- i dont know exactly what it is.
i know i am not telling you the whole thing- and im aware that its obvious that such an account fo a wandering may seem completely pointless. the thing about it is that memory is an utterly personal affair-- and even if i were to explain it, it would be hard to recapture the emotion in universally understandable terms. the act of voicing out would be in its exhibitionism a traversty; yet there is still an inexplicable need to tack the feeling down with certainty--what exactly it is about the place, those days, and you, that connect to the overwhelming intensity of that moment. and this is where i run out of words.
afterwards i went for cedar sports day which was fab. its quite sifferent from the rg one i think, though perhaps the difference can be explained by the difference in my position-- as teacher, i mean, as opposed to student. nonetheless i went to bum around with my classes, which was fun. i was sorely tempted to go home after going to buona vista, because im totally lost around toa payoh [i only know the way back to rj, and the way to the mutton soup stall haha] but i totally didnt regret going! :) its way more fun to watch the progress of the events with everybody instead of sitting at the teachers' grandstand- that way you get to make comments about the action and laugh as loudly as you want without the other staff thinking youre a weirdo. Grin. and of course, because my classes are SUCH good company, HOW could i ever resist your CHARRRRM? i ended the day adorned with lots of coloured ribbons, which is the problem of teaching too many classes, and that i dont have an instinctive colour loyalty because in rg i was in hadley [e purple house- 3z would be proud of me] and i would write more but for the fact that im LATE FOR LUNCH hurhur. have to scoot.
mellie contemplated 11:05 AM
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